Attention underachieving West Virginia University graduates: Charleston lawyers Greg Chiartas and Bruce Freeman want you.
Still living with mom and dad? Tired of admiring that framed college degree on your childhood bedroom wall? Stuck in a rut at work or looking for it? Sick of being socially disrespected by confident Marshall graduates?
Slacker Mountaineers, you may be powerless no more. There's someone to blame other than you.
Chiatras and Freeman are here to inform you that, contrary to what you've been told, it's not your fault. It's time to stop taking responsibility for yourself and start pointing the finger elsewhere.
There may even be money in it for you -- that's if you're willing to tell your slacker tale of woe to the court.
"We're trying to figure out if this is a viable cause of action and a legitimate concern with more than just a few people," said Chiatras to our Cara Bailey, explaining his rationale behind running plaintiff-recruitment newspaper ads aimed at WVU graduates.
"This is not about drumming up business," he said. Except that it might be. He just isn't sure yet.
Chiatras and Freeman are considering suing WVU on behalf of graduates who feel their degrees have been "diminished" by a recent scandal at the school. An investigative panel recently found that Heather Bresch, daughter of Gov. Joe Manchin, received a master's degree without completing the required coursework.
That's the opening. Because Ms. Bresch slid through school, all WVU graduates have suffered and are thus entitled to collect damages from the tax-supported school, the argument concludes.
"A tainted degree can affect them," Chiartas said.
So can loony legal reasoning, we hasten to add.
Chiatras and Freeman earned their law school degrees at WVU. Now they're trolling for plaintiffs eager to sue their alma mater?
The argument could be made that Chiatras and Freeman's curious legal theories may help prove the validity of their position about a diminished education. They might think it best to not want to win such a case.